And they say I'm crazy . . .

I'm afraid of heights.  There.  I said it up front.

Yeah, I've summitted three Fourteeners, and I teach skydiving almost every weekend now, but that's different.  I'll crawl all over the outside of an aircraft as long as it's above 1,000 feet and I'm wearing a parachute.  Mountains?  Well, the first one I did, the north Maroon Bell, in Colorado, back in 1978, I was feeling pretty sick at the top.  "That's just altitude sickness," said the lead climber in our group.  "Yeah," I thought, "The kind of sickness you get in the top of a tree that you weren't all that sure you could make your way back down."  We finished that descent by moonlight, by the way.

Anyway, I said all that to say this:  These guys are crazy.  This looks fun under only one circumstance: wearing a B.A.S.E. rig the entire time.  Under that condition, sure, I'd do this.  But otherwise, unclipped, unrigged, unenclosed?  Not on your life.  Nuts.  Plain and simple.

So, without further ado, here's the video.  If you can start it and watch one minute and not watch the entire seven plus, then you're a better man (or woman) than I.  And that's all I have to say about that.

I Guess Throwing Erasers Is Out of the Question

From the YGTBKM file, this was in today's Post and Courier: "Battery Creek teacher suspended for shooting foam dart."

Associated Press

Thursday, February 26, 2009

BEAUFORT — A science teacher at a South Carolina high school has been suspended after he shot a foam dart at a 14-year-old student.

The Beaufort Gazette reported that 29-year-old Jeffrey Baker is on paid administrative leave from Battery Creek High School for Monday's incident.

A Beaufort County Sheriff's Department report said Baker fired a foam dart from a toy gun toward a group of students who were talking and laughing in his class. The report said after most students quieted down, one girl continued to talk, and Baker fired a dart at her in a "joking manner," hitting her left shoulder.

The report says the girl slapped Baker with the back of her hand. School district officials would not say if she was or will be disciplined.

The report says the girl's mother wants to pursue an assault charge against Baker.

I remember when teachers threw erasers with impunity. At my "college," an instructor once launched one at a sleeping kid beside me but hit me instead, leaving a huge chalk-dust blot on my dark blue uniform jacket. Apology? Law suit? Assault charges? Right. He pointed at me and said, "Wake that guy up!" Those were the days.

Striving for Second Worst

Yesterday's blog post and the news story that spawned it reminded me of a story published in the Raleigh News & Observer back when I was a grad student at Chapel Hill.

Seems North Carolina had had the distinction of sporting the second worst SAT scores in the nation, then SC, who had been worst, moved up a notch, knocking us to the very bottom of the list. Comment from the state's education head? Not that we needed to look at the programs of the states near the top of the list and see what we could apply to The Old North State. No. In a remark that really revealed more about the roots of the problem than it was probably meant to, the person in charge of educating our Tarheel children remarked (and I may paraphrase here, after 19 years or so, but not much, if at all): "We clearly need to find out what South Carolina is doing, and do more of that."

Yeah. Second worst is so much better than the bottom.

If you get ambitious (I have the ambition, but not the time) and look up the original story (sometime between summer 89 and summer 91), I'd love to have a link.

Things I Wish I Still Didn't Know

From today's Post & Courier:

South Carolina suffered more violent crime than any other state last year, matching its dismal performance in the FBI's annual report for the second year in a row.

Now you tell me.

Why I Avoid Reporters, Always

The photo caption leading to this story reads:

Rev. Jesse Jackson speaks during a news conference in Chicago, Wednesday, July 9, 2008. Jackson apologized Wednesday for comments he made about Barack Obama's speeches in black churches during what he thought was a private conversation with a reporter.

Right. I'm pretty sure that part I bolded is more imaginary a thing than the unicorn. I thought all politicians knew that.

Lucky's Scrotum; or, Good Grief, Charlie Brown

This article about a new low in censorship caught my eye this morning. There's been plenty said about it already. Here's a blog with several posts about it, and some good links to further discussion in at least this one.

News of Note (to me)

I may have been offline, but I wasn't dead.

Among the articles that got my attention but weren't among the headlines, here are a few from the week in review:

• From the "Oh, lighten up!" file, there was a story in Thursday's Gazette about an e-mail making the rounds with neighborhood-specific Barbies (you really have to follow that link, and look closely at those two babies with Widefield Barbie) for southern Colorado. "Experts in human behavior say it’s juvenile, mean-spirited and a perpetuation of hurtful stereotypes. It could, some suggest, harm the self-esteem of children — and even adults — in the targeted neighborhoods." If the shoe fits . . . and believe me, as stereotypes go (founded in generalization based in fact) I have to admit, these hit pretty close to home. I would love to have a BMW convertible, Shallow Ken that I am. And stereotypes can play an educational role as well. I didn't even get Trinidad Barbie until my 18-year-old explained to me that Trinidad, Colorado, was the "Sex Change Capital of the World." Seriously people, laugh at it, get over yourself, and forward it to seven friends in the next hour or you'll have bad luck for a year.

• The Playboy Drill Sergeant thing has about played itself out, I think. Here's a follow up from Thursday's news, and probably, since there's a new issue on the stands now, one of the last things we'll hear about that. The whole story brings a whole new meaning to "force shaping."

• This piece from the "Yeah? Well read this!" file goes out to Nate, who's skepticism regarding global warming may be real or may be make-believe, but is a convenient target nonetheless (as, I suspect, he intends). Tucked away on page 10 was this little jewel, pointing out that, "Spurred on by an unusually warm Siberia, Canada, northern Asia and Europe, the world’s land areas were 3.4 degrees Fahrenheit warmer than a normal January, according to the U.S. National Climatic Data Center in Asheville, N.C. That didn’t just nudge past the old record set in 2002, but broke that mark by 0.81 degrees, which meteorologists said is a lot, since such records often are broken by hundredths of a degree at a time." Yeah, it was cold here, but just wait for summer baby.

• From the "Things you don't notice until someone points them out, then see all around you" file, comes an article on how we keep track of time. I've worn a watch for as long as I can remember. Too long to even fathom at what point it became a part of my flesh. Without something on that left arm--a self-setting, sun-powered, dive-safe, Casio G-shock for everyday--or an Eddie Bauer classic for dressier times--my wrist looks naked and scrawny. But according to this article, "In a survey last fall, investment bank Piper Jaffray & Co. found that nearly two-thirds of teens never wear a watch — and that only about one in 10 wears one every day." Wow. I live with teenagers, but I hadn't noticed this. Fascinating.

• From the "Goings on back home" file, this article about an English-only movement in Beaufort County, North Carolina, caught my eye this morning. It made for a particularly interesting read, arriving as it did, on the same day as an e-mail from a friend bearing this article on "the Amnesty Trail" from Wednesday's Tuscon Weekly

Finally, I have truly saved the best, from today's news, for last, but it is so important, it will get a post all its own. Stay tuned.